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welcome students to another riveting lecture from christa's fireside lectures for john 1. happy women's day for sunday and uh today i'm going to teach you how to write a story lead so if you have if you have done this little lesson which you should have done already but if you haven't please make sure that you do it it gives you the reason why we have story leads and what is in a lead okay so we've got the five w's and the h okay it also gives you an example of a news article with the anatomy so i've highlighted the different parts to show you what they are a lot of students can um confuse the headline with the lead the headline is different from the lead and we'll see this just now in the practical exercise but basically you need to look through this go through it make sure that you understand it i've highlighted all of the different parts for you and then i've given you an exercise for you to do for yourself i've also given you readings and exercises and also a multiple choice quiz so now we're going to go into this with another news article just for a little bit of practical experience i'm going to explain it to you again and so here we have a news 24 article this is the headline you can see firstly that the conventions are the headline that it doesn't use full sentences this is the only time that you do not use full sentences in your writing otherwise you always use full sentences here we've got 16 police officers bust in or tumble drug sting 13 20 traffic officers nabbed for corruption okay so that is the headline here we've got the date of release which is the 10th of august and here is the byline not that just this here is the byline the person who wrote this is called malibongwe daimane and the new and it's released by news 24 available to share through facebook twitter whatsapp and email okay now here we have our photograph remember that the image that you use in your article should somehow enhance the story and give the audience a visual connection to the story okay now we can see in the background here is it's a private residence it looks like a private residence there's a front door um and windows and there's a garage door and here we can see and that's also looks like a private car and then we can see the cop cars here with the hawks on the side okay there is no caption for this particular image although you should normally have a caption that explains particular visual points of focus in the image so it might not be ethical to identify whose house this is which is probably why you wouldn't be able to put in a caption in i imagine that you know you don't want to identify people's houses in a caption like this or in a in an image like this because it is and you'll find let's see what this means but it's subjudicy which is under the investigation of the courts so you may not identify or expose new information while it is either before trial or during an ongoing trial but we'll leave that for another time in the meantime let's look at this we've got um the image credit which you must always always include felix clanger mandla is the person who took the image but the company is gallo images and the publisher is network 24. now this is an interesting new convention that some online news articles have added to their um to their article or some newsline publishers wow online news publishers sorry long weekend have added to their new site and that is a very brief bulleted summary of the article so we can see here 16 police officers were arrested by the hawks following a two-year undercover investigation a 17th suspect will be added to the case at a later stage because he is in isolation due to covet 19 oh shem the hawks said that they also arrested 13 suanet officers for demanding bribes from motorists in a different sting operation okay so that is a summary of the article it is not the lead the lead uses full sentences and not bullet points here is your lead here 16 police officers have been arrested by the hawks for allegedly and remember this allegedly because they haven't been proven to have done it yet in a court of law allegedly stealing narcotics confiscated from drug mules at our tumble international airport they're alleged to have been doing this for several years okay um a 17th police officer would be added to the case at a later stage as he was in isolation due to covert 19 said the npa national prosecuting authority in a statement okay so there we go and then lastly you can have one two or three sentences in your lead and they basically explain the five w's and h the most important pieces of information about a news article the reason why we put it all up front first is to try and draw the reader in get them mentally asking more questions and then answer those questions in the rest of the article okay so we can take a look here who would be your 16 police officers have been arrested okay that would be what they have been arrested so start this from the beginning get it right 16 police officers is your who what have been arrested here's your howl okay by the hawks why for allegedly stealing narcotics confiscated from drug mules where at o.r tumble international airport now you guys might be tempted to go win is for several years but in actual fact the win is implied in the fact that they have been arrested it's recent so we can see that this is 10th of august they probably have been arrested on the 10th of august or late on the 99th of august in the evening the win in this case is implied it's not stated obviously um you have to be aware of the fact that the five ws and the h are they hang on each other they're not unrelated so you can't just go when several years and then who 16 police officers if you want to say have been arrested because they weren't arrested for several years do you see how that doesn't make sense they all hang together and they're all interrelated and that is how you make a lead from those five w's and h the five w is an h for those people who haven't done the um the worksheet here again who is the story about what has happened when did it happen where did it happen why did it happen and how did it happen okay so those are your five w's and your age and that is the very backbone of a news lead okay um you could even make an argument for saying that our tambo international airport isn't really the way because maybe that isn't where they were arrested so you know there is an argument to be made for that in which case the wear would also be implied and possibly answered later on in the um in the article so the importance of including quotes i just want to touch on these things very quickly the importance of including quotes the reason why we quote people directly is because it adds a certain level of credibility it's not just the journalist going this is what happened and that's what happened and this person said that when you quote somebody directly it lends more gravity it lends more credibility to the report because this is somebody who is qualified to comment on these things the director of public prosecutions in khaoteng advocate andrew chake he's not just you know the neighbor um he's not the friend of a friend cousins uncles roommates ex-girlfriend whatever he is qualified and this is what you must look for when you are getting quotes is this kind of qualification don't just quote anyone because what's the point you know you would need to quote someone who has weight behind them okay just take a look here this is not a direct quote even though it says um that pindim john dwan john duane said so okay this is a problem here can you see how they have misspelt this person's name at least once it's either john duane or it's it can't be both now this represents a distinct lack of dedication and detail orientation on the part of the subs because in order to get people's names right you need to sort of pay attention um it might have been a mistake on the part of the journalist but the sub-editors that get hold of the story afterwards and make it publishable should have picked up this this era and considering the fact that it's the khaoteng npa regional spokesperson it's not like you know it's just an odd person off the street even if it is an odd person off the street you must always pay them the respect of getting their name right every single time this is very very important when you are writing news articles sources give you their time and their quotes for free and information quotes are the journalists stock and trade you get that for free you cannot buy it and so what you give back what you trade for that information is respect this error here even though it is just an error that people make sometimes does show a lack of respect so um you know the person here is is probably going to read this article and go yo they got my name wrong what the hell and you don't want that from your sources because sometimes if you get their names wrong they can take offense and they won't want to talk to you again so anyway let's carry on with this um the importance of quotes yeah lends weight to the article it shows that you've done your research you've spoken to the right people and you have based the information that you've got on reliable credible sources not just someone who's standing by that you questioned and they went oh i think maybe no these people actually knew what was going on they were involved in the operation okay um here we've got in the middle of the article also read now this is also an interesting convention that people have sort of adopted over time they'll put related ads or ads for related articles in between the different paragraphs and this is because people who um read these kinds of articles might go oh hold on a minute um let's look at that one as well let's look at this one as well but they might not go all the way down to the bottom and go related let's see what we've got here so um yeah this is a this is a sneaky way of of sort of getting more traffic into your website and getting more views on your articles um by sort of slutting them in there you know but they have to be related to the content of the article so this is all about crime this is all about stealing and drugs and tambo airports so those are all related to this case not necessarily directly but in terms of content um you don't have to worry about doing that because this is the kind of thing that the website um the tech gods will add in you know and the editor they'll decide on that kind of thing this is not something that the journalists did um okay so i think that that is a pretty good uh sort of overview of an article in general um i have waffled a bit i'm sorry about that and i know that i'm trying to keep these short for you guys so that you don't you know char your data but if you have questions about this please make sure that you ask don't hesitate you must clarify any aspects of this lesson that you don't understand because it is very important for you to be able to create an effective lead to that end i have prepared an exercise that i'm going to do now with you it comes from a very very old assessment from a number of years ago so don't expect to see this in any of your assessments but um i think it's a pretty good example so imagine that you're a journalist and you arrive at a scene and something has happened and you have taken notes now these are the notes that you have taken you can only rely on the information that you get from your sources you may not make stuff up it is highly unethical to make stuff up to just like fill in details that you might not have as a journalist it's not allowed and there have been journalists who have done that they've lost their jobs it's as simple as that it's unethical so let's see what information you as a journalist managed to write down in your notebook police used rubber bullets and stunt grenades to disperse protesters the protests lasted from thursday morning well into saturday night large quantities of alcohol were found in abandoned bottles after protesters had been dispersed they came they just came and took our student cards said figgy lim keys a student at the university of advantage runs experienced protracted protests this week there were guys wearing eff student command t-shirts but we had never seen them on campus before said a student who wishes to remain anonymous five protesters were killed with live ammunition now for those of you who you know have been following the news at all you should know that this statement here should start the alarm bells ringing so i'm going to highlight it there is a saying in journalism if it bleeds it leads five protesters were killed with live ammunition so this is the kind of thing that you want to look out for when you have a whole stash of information that you've taken down at random in your notebook you haven't ordered it in any way because you've been too busy interviewing people and writing and um checking you know who was there what are their credentials can i quote them contact um and making sure that you get their words right and their names right so you're not going to have a chance to edit the information on the fly you're going to need to take the information down and then and then you look for the most important newsworthy piece of information okay so those killed were identified as members of the economic freedom fighters but not of their student command those killed were not students adverts according to police police are following up on information offered by students an internal investigation has been launched into how the rubber bullets were replaced with live ammunition when the first student went down and we saw the blood we shouted to each other to stop firing but it was already too late said lieutenant smith tearfully students reported that the protests began on thursday morning after residences were stormed by people who appeared to be part of eff student command private security forces were overrun and the entrances and exits to the university were barricaded police were able to gain access at one entrance using yala's for those of you who don't know nyalas are those big truck things that the cops use protesters stole student cards from resident students to gain access to buildings several buildings were set afire before police were able to subdue protesters and secure the campus for emergency services on saturday evening there were broken beer and wine bottles everywhere the place smelled like a bar recalls chief fire marshal okay so that is all of the information that you've got so far the most important thing that we've got is five protesters were killed with live ammunition and maybe that should be our who five protesters what were killed how with live ammunition okay now if we're gonna do this let's do it properly let's put this here copy no not edit header paste okay five protesters so this is our what did we say who let's just put that in there and obviously you're not going to be writing the who and the whites and everything in your actual lead but i'm just doing this for you guys so you can see how okay so what do we need now we need the when where and the why yeah i think that's it okay so when were they killed um [Music] well into saturday nights i think we can go and now you don't know exactly when they were killed but you know that the protests lasted from thursday to saturday so we can say five protesters were killed with live ammunition during okay and this is your where um university because you want to know where um which took between thursday and saturday evening uh that would be your win now that is one sorry that is one sentence next sentence and let's just uh let's just highlight what we've used we've used that and we use that and you see how we've condensed this into one sentence when when and if you get this kind of exercise in an assessment you mustn't just copy paste the the pieces of information in the right order because you need to use your own brains and write the sentence using the information that you've got in your own words make your own sentences this is um this is something that you know you need to learn to do as a journalist you also need to learn to do it as a student because you can't just quote what everybody else writes it's never ever going to benefit you in any way you're only relying on other people's sentences and then later on when you get to actually have to write your own sentences you won't have any practice so start doing it now create your own writing but base it on what you've been given and that goes for the textbook that goes for any other sources as well um so where can we find an internal investigation has been launched into how rubber bullets were replaced with live ammunition this says to us that they don't know how it happened they have no clue how they took out the guns with the rubber bullets and all of a sudden there were real bullets there so we don't have to put this whole thing in there we can simply add um police were unable to explain how this took place okay and that is your why so let's look at this quickly and make sure that it all hangs together your who who did it happen to five protesters what happened they were killed how with live ammunition where during um okay fitz university during and then when during protracted protests which took place thursday to saturday why we don't know okay um then from there you can wait where are we okay okay then you can pick up the next most important information which is um you know there seems to be some doubt as to whether the people who started the um protests were students on campus because you can even use this from the beginning now you can use this whole sentence because this looks coherent yeah students reported that the protests began on thursday morning after residences were stormed by people who appear to be part of eff student command [Music] and then you can use this one because this is also important and it should follow logically okay this your articles should have some kind of logic behind it not necessarily that you use a formula but that one idea should flow onto the next and each idea should have its own paragraph don't forget that so um we've used that where are we there we've used wait students reported where are we there um then we can go either oh here we've got a quote now you can choose to put this quote in killing me dude you can choose to put this quotes in after here because it is a fairly powerful quote and it relates directly to what happened to the five protesters um then okay so we've done done that um we can put in this quote but the eff student command t-shirts but they've never seen them before over here just to back up what you're saying as journalist then then you can look at what else is available we've got student cards okay copy that down here okay and when you when you do this kind of exercise remember that i'm putting these bullets in um just to show you where your paragraphs are gonna be but you mustn't use bullets as you can see with this article they're not using bullets they're just using sentences and if you notice carefully you'll see that each idea has its own paragraph even though it might just be one tiny short sentence like this it doesn't matter each idea has its own paragraph that is a convention in news writing in fact it's a convention in writing in general but news has to be shortened to the point which means that your your paragraph your idea is going to be one or two sentences as opposed to um you know three or four sentences which is what we normally have in academic writing um there we go okay so from there let's see what else have we got um okay you can instead of just instead of using this you can also well i suppose you can also just put the next quote there they just came and took our student cards okay so this is explaining how the protest happened like that um let's leave the alcohol to last because you know it doesn't really it's not it doesn't have any bearing on the five protesters who were killed with live ammo um yeah okay there is an indication because of the beer and the wine bottles everywhere that these guys were drunk um and that they you know were just raging because they were drunk and angry as opposed to like a legit student protest but um you can't sort of throw empty beer bottles in the middle of something like this because it has to be all together and it has to be um part of the logical flow of the article so um what do we got here left we've got several okay um protesters stole student cards from resident students to gain access to the buildings then you've got your quote then we can put several buildings or set a fire after that um it's pretty straightforward then it's really just a mopping up exercise um it has to be logical though just remember that so several buildings were set to fire okay so they gained access to the buildings they set stuff on fire then um private security forces were overrun and the entrances and exits were barricaded okay so no one could get in police however were able to access through okay i'm doing it this way because like i said i'm trying to keep this video short but i might actually want to rewrite this to make it flow better um just because i'm kind of pedantic that way and then once they got in with the nyalas they used rubber bullets and stun grenades to disperse students and or the protesters should we say because it seems like the students weren't involved and then after they were dispersed here we can throw in the beer bottles there okay so we've used that and we'll use our final quote from our fire chief copy here okay and please remember that when you have a quote each quote must have its own line you can't then start another sentence straight after the quote you need to leave a line start a new paragraph and do another and then you know start writing again you can leave some of it out but you can also choose to slot in that last little bit of information somewhere else those killed were not students adverts according to police so um you can even work it into the sentence here so we can write something like and please confirmed that they were not registered as students at the institution see how i didn't okay i know i've taken the easy way out for the sake of time but in this instance i didn't just copy paste that sentence i rewrote it um to blend in with that sentence there so that it works well so that it flows nicely so what have we got here this is our oh and please i didn't use um full stops on all of them but you need to begin a cap begin a sentence with a capital letter in the sentence with a full stop don't use commas unless you absolutely have to try never to use the word whereby ever and also make sure that when you quote you use quotation marks always there is our article here we have our five w's and our h and then the rest of it in order of most important um to least important okay once you have finished writing the article and giving valid relevant information just stop try and make sure that you have answered all the questions and if you um and look a legitimate um illegitimate um conclusion might be something like um once um once the um i don't know um police have confirmed that those responsible for the student debts will be prosecuted once they have been identified okay because you might have somebody going hold on a minute but what are the cops going to do about the people that killed the students or protesters okay now we check it over and we go okay [Music] what happened are we implicating anybody um or are we just stating the facts if there is anybody um that might be sort of before a court for some reason then we need to go alleged okay so we look through it and we go okay do we need to we need to use the word alleged anywhere here don't think so okay and that's it that is our article from this mess of information here and that's basically how you do it if you have questions please make sure that you ask and um yeah i'll make this available on call campus well the link will be available on call campus and yeah good luck with the f1 thanks a lot guys