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you every 92 seconds someone is sexually assaulted in this nation it is a problem and we have to talk about it today I want to talk to you about consent coercion and sexual violence and give you all tips to talk to your people about this problem now I know everyone wonders why this is my topic and I want to tell you a little bit about myself I'm the youngest of five in a blended family my father was born in 1937 and that tip the topics of sex sexuality consent and contortion were not things we discussed in our home and that led me to want to normalize these conversations to talk about these things and educate currently I work as a nurse practitioner inside of a school in a school-based health center here in Carbondale Illinois Terrier care while working at Terrier care I noticed that we were having an increase in reports of sexual misconduct and sexual violence that led me to see for our children being educated on these issues what was happening I found that at our school students are educated on these topics but they're educated in one health course taken generally their freshman year one time many young people haven't been in these situations at that age and it seems that they forget so my job is also to understand what is affecting young people what is bothering them and if it's bothering them that it means that I need to be aware and do something to change that the young people were very open about learning about consent coercion and sexual violence so then I realized we also need to talk to the adults in their lives then I found that teachers and schools don't really want to talk about it parents don't want to talk about it and young people fall in three different categories they either are afraid to bring it up don't know how to bring it up or the scariest notion they think they already know everything there is to know about it so they don't bring it up so what I want everyone in this room to do is to take a moment and think back I want you to think back to what you were doing in high school in college then I want you to add in Facebook Instagram snapchat and all of the social media that young people have access to now then for fun remember that they also have smartphones and they have access to pornography all day long and we have what I like to call a recipe for disaster the media movement recently also made us all stop and think have we been talking about consent what is consent how do you get consent how do I know consent is an agreement between all participants to engage in sexual activity and it should be continuous and can be rescinded at any time it's important talk to the young people in your life make sure that they understand what consent is make sure that they're familiar with the law the law whether you reside and the laws were you frequent in the United States of America the legal age of consent varies between the ages of 16 and 18 the state of Illinois Falls smack dab in the middle with a legal consent age of 17 so that means that no one under the age of 17 can consent to sexual activity make sure that young people are aware that if someone has ingested alcohol legal or illegal drugs or even prescription drugs that have mind-altering effects they cannot consent to sexual activity that is illegal also talk to young people make sure that they know if you're touching someone they should be touching you back young people also need to be aware of other clues that you do not have consent if someone is limp if someone is motionless blank face off into space or they have not verbally said yes those are all clues that you do not have consent also a person may consent for one act that does not mean that they have consented to every act you should discuss that make it clear and make it plain to the young people coercion coercion is always a little bit difficult for the young people because they have spent their entire lives coercing their parents to do what they want them to do coercing their teachers to change grades and change assignments they have learned that you can coerce people to do just what you want in a multitude of situations and then they don't understand that this does not apply in sexual situations we have to tell them coercion is compelling by force intimidation authoritative or dominating and exploiting someone's fears anxieties or desires we have to teach young people that sexual acts should never be a manner in which for anyone to prove their love or their dedication to another person that is coercion and it is wrong and we have to talk to young people and make it clear and make it plain that coercion is illegal and wrong sexual violence sexual violence is a term that's an umbrella and it encompasses rape assault domestic violence dating violence and stalking in this nation young women aged 16 to 19 are four times as likely as a general population to be victims of sexual assault most sexual assaults do happen to women and most often men are perpetrators but it does affect everyone in this room as a provider I've heard various accounts of times of sexual violence and young people have recanted stories of being physically pressured and maneuvered to perform sexual acts they've also reported being driven to various locations and told that they would not be taken home unless they engaged in sexual acts and we've also had more than one report of a young person who was videoed or photographed and then told that they had to engage in acts of sexual nature to prevent those images from being leaked it is very much a problem and I wish that those stories that I just told were only one-time things but that has not been the case we have a problem I want you all to go out and to talk to the young people you know we have to normalize this we have to discuss this issue and we have to educate our young people they are our leaders and they are the method for us to change this and remember every 92 seconds someone is assaulted and that is far too much thank you [Applause]