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[Music] [Applause] [Music] last night I was reading a book ah that's very good it proves one has an education first one starts reading books then one starts smoking cigarettes and before one knows it one is going out with women I was reading a book by some professor and it said the fastest thing in the world is light it travels at the rate of 186,000 miles a second no kidding that's only the second fastest thing in the world yeah what is the fastest thing wise guy ever see a sailor on a 48 Wow we have another reader here let us see what he is reading it's called sailor courageous Charlie Noble went in on the first wave as he hit the beach he stepped to a crossfire from the machine guns a bullet tore off his helmet but he didn't stop while the guy's a hero ha ha ha very funny very funny boys will you ever forget that last invasion the perils and hardships we went through sweating it out med warehouse piling up K rations what was terrifying why we weren't much more than 6 or 700 miles from the shooting look bill you don't have to be a Superman when you go after a blonde somebody's got to be back there throwing those supplies around if we're gonna win a war remember that amen amen yeah why don't you quit boning up on being a hero and be yourself ah come on give me back my maggot hey wait a minute what's the idea wearing that uniform well it cost me 45 bucks I like a filler zipper oh come on lay off me when do you guys that's no uniform that's a zoot suit the next thing you'll be wearing a silk hat and a ballet skirt or just because you're in the Navy doesn't make you a different guy why don't you act normal yeah and talk normal to even the Dames James he says Oh get him talking to the master are you kidding everything adrift rates the lucky bag you boys store older equipment before you go ashore this section goes on report carry Hoss look Bob yeah I hate to bore you with gruesome details but you owe me five bucks and I don't care if you don't give it to me till right now okay anybody got change for a ten yeah I have what a roll two fives okay yeah I'm gonna take all that ashore not even a money belt why sure what oh I don't know it's kind of nice to have along just in case and I may send some home to my mother well why don't you make out an allotment put all the dough you don't need on the ship's books haha listen I could take care of my own pay I'm no dope hey that's about seven months pay isn't it yeah about you were smart enough not to carry seven months pay around with you when you were civilian so now you're in the Navy why do you have to act like it was dropped on your head don't worry Junior nobody's gonna get anything off of me somebody jump us adrift oh that's rad she's in sick bay with cat fever liberties can't stow it will you come on I'll have to stand in front of you the old D might spot that uniform okay be right with you this is a place well I guess I'll shove off I'll see you later huh hey why don't you come alongside with me wow it's cook well what's in your mind well I'm meeting my date just about right now maybe she's got a friend yeah what kind of a babe have you got all she's swell and good-looking yeah I mean what kind is she you know that she well why don't you see for yourself okay well hey what'd you do that for those lousy civilians taking it easy well one the big fellas a veteran and the little guy is wearing a button for two sons and service yeah well he oughta watch where he's going hey get a load of the lucky brave watches good afternoon sir afternoon notice that first sailor body was being cute hey what's the idea lasting up my gag you know Phil I don't understand you you're a nice guy but you're always pulling these stupid little stunts I'm just trying to have a little fun you have got a sense of humor that's what's wrong with you come on before you get on report [Applause] [Music] look bill I hate preaching but you're wearing long pants now so stop acting like a dead-end kid toward civilians and officers the Navy goes in for courtesy like saluting for instance it's an order to an admiral the same as you and besides if you don't salute then you put the other guy on the spot if you're not enough of a regular guy to obey a simple order oh hi cutie pie well it'd be sailors a steak french fries and a bottle of brew no steak hamburger okay hamburger on Owen's knowing you make mine the same hey Mack yeah oh yeah cups Kozma thought water taffy why Alice how are you oh I want you to meet a shipmate of mine bill Adams bill this is Alice Carlson alright didn't you find out we've quite a day ahead of us considering the time you gave me the plan well what's the problem well I thought we'd go swimming and then to my house for dinner that is unless you'd rather go out someplace and to Luna Beach the band there is out of this world one drum and sixteen faxes and a swell gangs going well how about fixing up bill with a date look don't bother about me I'll take care of myself huh there ain't no attention to me now you think you can get somebody oh I guess so like me to try now there's a phone on the dump and look really fix him up it's Alston she's not bad but I better girlfriend's a dog they always are well count me out will ya save the child for your gal when she comes back so she won't be too sore and tell her I'm glad I met her but I'm sorry I just couldn't wait to meet her friend huh yeah take it out of this there's your change ah forget it where you off to oh I don't know other couple of spots I want to hit downtown yeah I know you sure go for the joints down there they'd clip their own mother for their wedding rings I have it don't worry about me who's worrying have a lovely evening but back home you wouldn't be caught up in a lay with any of those broken-down floozies I know but I'm not that cool see you later huh go ahead jr. prove your old man [Music] [Music] well what'll it be sailor Boilermaker the best you got how about hey right I'll be six bits okay [Music] they are keep the change [Music] [Music] Emily oh I'm sorry I thought you were a friend of mine [Music] I would have been they're lucky from the back you look just like him he's very well-built - well I could say the same for you I was supposed to meet Johnny here but I had trouble finding the place made me so late I guess he figured I wouldn't come guy in wait for you hey he must be an awful dope you're sweet well look as long as you're gonna be here why don't you have a drink with me yeah Margie bill hey hey bartender how about service for the lady in me unless you're too old fashioned double old-fashioned you're another boiler maker make it double well I guess this is my lucky day Nene you know what else good at me guys I'm tired a little break sometimes things been pretty tough rugged rugged you've been a night of those invasions you read about Oh tell me about it now you either be three in a corner okay hey keep the change [Music] bill tell me about it well I went in on the first way we hit the beach and machine guns opened up on either side of us they got our range and one of the boats knocked off my helmet but I didn't stop hi-oh by this time it's it's light and we haven't had a neat show that's the cha that's what they call the me that's something to eat do we have any chow since the day before wait you're hungry hungry huh there is started I are celibate go okay here's $10 there keep it changed by far not around I think any way to other more correspondence of my head to other corresponds and myself that's where what is my girlfriend anyway to corresponds to myself we haven't hit the sack say that oh the sack that's that's a navy term for what do you sleep I let's say I don't know why they call it there but they call the same really and we finest what was left of an old barn there wasn't very much but Bowie we brother was a lot better than nothing I could tell you left all right oh this barrage kept covered the barrage boom boom bow but it didn't wake us up cuz we were so sleepy we're sleeping how'd you know the shooting went on well excuse me gotta see a man about a boat oh listen take a bull ride that's first how'd you know they were still shooting if you were asleep ya see iris Lena Bryson oh well I tell you I don't think you'd understand that's a sailor talk here so I have a chapel in one hand and then the other Japanese and I pass their heads together I clean out the whole place and that's why they gave you those ribbons that's why they gave you those ribbons all right sailor oh this is my friend how about a drink no no I don't want that shore Patrol playing nursemaid to my joint you're better scram oh I suppose he's in see you anything I've dropped all right all right look now I don't want to have any trouble with you but that's final no more drinks oh no more drugs no more drinks hello hi buy a drink sure but I got plenty of don't know me sailor save you down huh thank you how does a bowtie that's pretty good for you yeah well come on let's have a drink okay we're gonna hurry but it against the law no more that's final Oh gets a larger lousy joint honey let's go yeah let's get out of here let's call it Thanks no save your money let's walk ah you wanna save your money baby let's go up to your place hmm Joey what do you mean you think I'm some round-heeled you've got another thing coming now grab your socks and show you lamebrain well when did they leave a couple of quarts ago I'd say from the looks of you sailor how did you get back here it's instinct drunks cats and homing pigeons I ordered dinner and I but I didn't I didn't that's right nothing much left don't it think you could use a few yeah that's what I need singers and coffee black coffee that's black oh boy is especially good black coffee keep you awake yeah that'll be 15 cents mere pittance I'll get it right here at Putin's daddy hey where's my goal Hey look my dogs gone hey where's my doll what's the trouble sailor I've been robbed somebody I had my money right here seven months pay and it's all gone where you been I been replaced to 3 PI I don't know lots of places oh you've been with hey I wasn't my shipmate that's what up man and then I met a babe that was where that old boy I remember her name what'd she look like oh she she's a good kid but I talked too fast that's why it wasn't don't you know who she was at Central I talked too damn fast and she got mad at me and then and she left that's the trouble these boys will do like they've been warned they bring too much money as sure and flash it around and get drunk and first thing you know they've been dipped maybe by some cutie or rolled lots of times like this there isn't much you can do for them they can't give enough information to make a case looks like he's seen a lot of action too you'd think they'd know better yeah but some guys never listen [Music] Hey how's about a drink swellow coming down the hatch [Music] what a life and is this nice duty here we are a good trim always makes me hungry gee Marilyn you've been a swell sport yes I hope they get it honey maybe these will make you feel better beside I not stuck I always have an extra date lined up especially with the Navy [Music] and that guy bill couldn't wait smart boy [Music]