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Facebook Messenger is not something I recommend for reaching out because there's so many better ways to do it. Mostly, my outreach focuses on cold email but I have gotten clients through Facebook Messenger, and I'm constantly pinged by people on Facebook Messenger. So, in today's video, I want to dig into a message we got recently from a web development company that wants to do an agency partnership and is doing everything wrong in their outreach. So, let's dig into the message and see what we can improve. So, here's the message that we got - Hello, I represent PIQUED Digital Media, a Crossbreed Web-Application Development center + Creative Agency, based out of India - So, nobody is reading this, first of all, and what I wanted to do today is improve this. So, let's pop this over to a Google Doc. And you can download this, by the way, there's a link in the description below. Just put it over in this Google Doc and see what we can improve. - Hello - Hello So, the first thing is, one don't do this. I get this a lot on Facebook, where someone will just say hello with nothing. And so, I guess he saw the error in his ways and he responded with the whole message after. But rule number one here, if you're doing Facebook outreach don't ever just say 'Hi' or 'Hi Alex' or something like that. I get messages like this all the time, it's so annoying, and I don't know what to do with them because I'm not gonna respond and start this whole conversation. But, this is the exact opposite meaning, Hello by itself is too short, doesn't say any context, doesn't give any reason to respond back. But 'Hello, I represent PIQUED Digital' and going on for paragraph after paragraph, it's too long. Here is a good test you can put through your messages too. Where would you stop reading? So, I stopped reading, 'Hello, I represent PIQUED Digital Media.' That's it, you know, I stopped reading right there. So, instead let's do something like this, first of all, remove the second 'Hello' 'Hey Alex' Let's assume you are reaching out to a business. One, I would do some research on the business itself. So, you know, the founders name or, you know, the exact person you are talking to. So, let's assume we did that for Experiment 27. You found out I'm the CMO or maybe you are talking to Robert or say you're trying to talk to the CEO. 'Hey Robert, huge fan of x27' is the initial, and then what I'll do is go over to the website of the company. For agencies, and for agency partnerships specifically, I have found that calling out the past clients is something that works well. 'Hey Robert, huge fan of X27 love that you've worked with Applaudo.' Even something as simple as that. And then let me digest this so I can figure out what they are doing. So, they do; Web Development, Digital Marketing, no design, it looks like they don't do design, YouTube ads, Website Development which they've Web applications and Website development. So, I'd pick one of these two based on what you can offer. So, for instance, PIQUED Digital Media is reaching out to a marketing agency and so, there are two strategies you can approach partnerships with. One is, you want to do the work of the agency that you're reaching out to and you want to do it for cheaper. I wouldn't hit them with both of those pitches at once. I would assume what they want and then pitch them whatever that is. So, for us we are a marketing company. I'm assuming we are already great at marketing so let's pitch Web development. 'Hey Robert, huge fan of X27 and I love that you've worked with Applaudo. We do web development and it would be great to talk about a potential partnership. Do you build websites for your clients currently?' There is the message. 'Hey Robert, huge fan of X27 and I love that you've worked with Applaudo. We do web development and it would be great to talk about a potential partnership. Do you build websites for your current clients? Been in the business for 50+ years- This is what he says, 'cumulative experience of 50+ years- First of all, 'cumulative' is spelled wrong. -Cumulative experience of 50+ years.' I would say something that is more realistic because the internet has not been around for 50 years. And I get that he is saying cumulative experience but I would say how long you've been in the business. 'Been in the business for 15+ years' And then that's it, no thanks, no sign off of your name because what this will look like is, 'Hey Robert, huge fan of X27 and I love that you worked with Applaudo. We do web development and it would be great to talk about a potential partnership. Do you build websites for your current clients?' and I would put this here. So this is another thing when you're writing your outreach scripts, sometimes things that look good in the Google Doc don't look good in the actual place they're gonna be seen. So, it's always good to write or rewrite in that place. 'Hey Robert, huge fan of X27 and I love that you've worked with Applaudo. We do web development and it would be great to talk about a potential partnership- Let me switch these around, and this is another part of writing emails reading it out loud, going through it again and again and just trying to get it perfect. - It would be great to talk about a potential partnership- we've been in the web development business for 15+ years. Do you build websites for your clients currently?' 'Hey Robert, huge fan of X27 and I love that you've worked with Applaudo. It would be great to talk about a potential partnership- we've been in the web development business for 15+ years. Do you build websites for your clients currently?' I'm not asking for a meeting here because this is Facebook Messenger and Facebook Messenger is meant to start conversations. So, what I am doing here is asking a Yes-or-No question because I know Robert, being the CEO of X27, is busy and if somebody is busy its better to ask them a Yes-or-No question. So, he'll either say, 'Yes, we build websites' or 'no' or 'not interested' which is also a possibility. And then from there, he'll say yes and then you will be like, 'Oh! Cool. We can do it cheaper, you want to hop on a call?' or he'll say no and then you could say, 'you ever thought about building websites for your agency? We could do it pretty cheap', 'you ever thought about adding website creation as a service? It would really help your marketing clients,' stuff like that. Go back and forth. This is Facebook messenger, again, so it's really conversational. If you want this script, we've got it here. I'll also put there a long script if you want to know what not to do, 'WHAT NOT TO DO' right here. And that's down in the description below. If you want to work with me on your messages, you can book a consult over at experiment27.com/consult If you want us to do outreach for your agency, you want to meet with billion-dollar brands, go over to experiment27.com that's what we do all day. If you want to buy this hoodie, you know, this sick beast hoodie, that's over at wohello.com Subscribe to the channel, like the video and I will talk to you another time. I'm Alex Berman, thanks.