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FAQs
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How can I sign up for WeChat on my Mac without owning a phone?
For all you Mac users with Mac OS X 10.7 (Lion) or later, simply download WeChat for Mac in the App Store and scan the QR code to log in. Along with being able to chat with WeChat friends and groups on your desktop, the Mac App makes it easy to transfer files from your mobile device to your desktop and vice versa with the “File Transfer” capability. Just drag and drop your photos, media and other files into the “File Transfer” folder. Or upload desktop files directly within a chat to send to friends. As long as you’re logged into WeChat for Mac, alerts will pop up on your computer’s menu bar without notifications on your phone. WeChat for Mac also supports Sight videos, allows users to view chat histories forwarded by friends and search contacts as well as groups. So whether you’re chatting on your desktop, iPad, or smartphone device, WeChat constantly aims to innovate and deliver you the best cross-platform social communications experience possible.
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How can I use Quora to make money?
I joined Quora in September 2017. Initially I used to write answers only since I was more fascinated with the stats that were displayed on the profile. Slowly I signNowed 500 k views. Took lesser time to signNow 1 million views and it continued. Then I had genuine questions, so I tried asking them on Quora. I received a lot of answers on my questions. Each question, on an average received 4–5 answers. One fine day in December 2018, after 15 months of using Quora and having asked about 20 questions by then, I got a notification that I was invited for the Quora Partner Program. I was aware of what it was and it was excited. I asked two or three questions by the end of the year but hardly got any returns on it. Two friends of mine were already a member of this program and they told me that they could hardly earn 5 cents even after writing for months. That discouraged me and I stopped asking questions. I stuck to writing answers only. This continued till May 2019. Then one day I saw the earning statistics of the members of this program and they were considerably well paid. In fact, the highest earning members make a fortune. So I again resumed asking questions. But this time, quality questions. And my questions started gaining audience. I received my first payment from Quora in the month of June which amounted to 14.84 US dollars. After deductions, I received 995 Indian rupees in my account. I continued writing questions in June and I received my second payment in July. That was about 11.64 US dollars and I got 778 rupees after deductions. This month I have earned 15.53 dollars till now, which amounts to around 1,030 rupees. My total earning statistics: I believe this is quite a bit of side income. However people earn more. GV sir here earns 20 to 30 times more than this monthly! He is also envious of other users who earn more so you can imagine how much the top partners earn!
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How can I meet BTS in person?
Well, it depends. You would probably have to go to Korea because they almost never have American fansigns but when they do you literally get like five seconds with them because they don’t speak English except for Namjoon. But I’m not even sure if you can even go to a fan sign without being a Korean resident which sucks. But it’s possible so DON’T LOSE HOPE!PS: If you ever see them in public DO NOT walk up to them because they don’t like to be bombarded by people because it may bring attention and other people like paparazzi and haters could crowd them and they would have to run away and we don’t want our boys to feel uncomfortable. BUT. You could do something like this fan did. (I couldn’t find the vid so here is an explanation. Some ARMY saw Namjoon at a museum and wanted to somehow interact with him but she didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable so, she got this idea. Her idea what she would walk by Namjoon singing No More Dream to herself and hopefully he would notice her. (Notice me senpai!) It did work and Namjoon looked at her and smiled and she smiled back. Overall I am so jealous and I give full props to the girl without tripping in front of him. So, this was longer than I intended so quick summary: It’s possible but it won’t be very quickly. But hopefully we could get full fan signs! FIGHTING!!!!
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How can you identify a narcissist?
Early Signs And Symptoms, How To Spot Them Up!There are signs and symptoms early on the relationship and late on the relationship,i will write down some of the most important signs and symptoms,again it’s really difficult but you will be aware most of the times because they follow a predictable pattern of Love Bomb-Devalue and Discard.Early Stages of Relationship-Love Bombing symptoms:They portray themselves as victims, basically sharing all the sad stories that happened to them, how they got mistreated and abused by people, with this method they gain your sympathy and connect you even deeper to helping them, loving them and also trying to fix them.They are too good to be true.In the first conversations you connect deeply to them, basically they will mirror everything about your character traits, style, interests and it will feel basically like they are the closest person to you character from day 1.You are the best thing that happened to them ever, no one understands them as you do, they got abused by everyone else and you finally are their savior.The biggest red flag that the victims should be on the lookout for is Parental Neglect or childhood abuse, if they share those things with you, especially too soon, run for your life, it won't end up well for you.They will love bomb you, raise you on a pedesta, basically shower you with compliments, and every compliment or feeling you give to them they will answer back with more of the same. This is the stage where they hook you up to their validation, attention, adulation, and admiration.They are very interested in you, from the first few conversations, asking you everything about yourself, how your day was, basically they will give you an amount of abnormal attention early on, initiating the conversations first, talking to you for hours daily, they are gaining your trust in this phase and getting you hooked to the game.Unbearable mood swings, in one moment they are all lovely, the other moment they just go exploding on you, you feel like you are walking on eggshells due to their unpredictable mood swings, they are basically sucking and draining your energy alongside with your esteem.They cause drama out of the blue, since drama brings excitement and to see how much you are willing to tolerate and with how much they are able to get away with, they daily cause drama for no reason and then apologize telling you they were overthinking, basically you don’t know what you are going to expect for the next moment, that’s their manipulation technique to get you even more hooked to their game.They shower you with all attention, adulation, emotions, love, care, they are like babies they care way too much way to early, and expect you to answer back with the same things, that’s the part where they try to connect you to their Empathy.Extremely sexual on the first meeting or conversation, they will try to hook you to their game with sexuality and if that does not work they will be emotional and lovely, they switch way too quick from manic to depressive state, basically today they will be sexual and tomorrow tell you off to see how much they can get away with, and how much you are going to insist for them to stay with you.Late Stages of Relationship-Devalue and Discard symptoms:All the attention, adulation, admiration, care is vanished they are cold and distant.Everything you do irritates them, even the jokes that they used to laugh at, or the things that you enjoyed together.You are never enough for anything that you do, they keep dropping sarcasm on every sentence.They get bored with you, since they possess no Empathy and a really low boredom tolerance level.You see their true face after 2–3 months, that everything was an act from them, the person that you thought they were does not exist, it’s an illusion presented by them, their mask or facade drops off since acting takes lots of energy from them.They start to devalue after the love bombing.You feel like you are walking on eggshells, you want their attention, love and care and they withhold their feelings, they withhold everything, you try to search for answers they don’t give you any clear answers, just dull and cold answers, never initiating the contact first, lies flying all over your face, they tell you they are bored, every time you ask for answers, you will get none, you are getting tired losing energy, you don’t know what to expect from this relationship, all the thoughts going on in your head you want some kind of closure, where they give you as little to hang in there.When you try to raise an opinion or ask the relationship to be a two way street, asking them why they changed, or where is the old person you once knew, calling them on their actions and lies, they refuse everything, further manipulating you with methods like:1. Gaslighting: basically refusing everything that you are saying, they would slap you today and tomorrow tell you they didn’t do it, since they know that you wont leave easy they have tested you and your patience, and they know you got a deep connection to them with empathy, they make you doubt yourself and your vision.2. Stone Walling: You ask a question about where are their feelings, she switches the topic and never answers, you ask a question about what they feel, they tell you they do not know, you never get a straight answer.3. Silent Treatments: Every time you call them on their actions this is the cruelest method that they can use,they basically vanish or give you the ghosting or the cold shoulder,they vanish for days,weeks,months,years by answering none of your calls or messages,you don’t know what in the heck happened everything seemed so good,the silent treatment time increases much more when you call them on their actions and ask them for their empathy,you will feel ignored,shattered,in pain,in sorrow etc,then just when you try to move on with your life they re-appear like nothing happened and pick up the things where you left them off even doe if they went off for months or years,With this technique they will escape any responsibility for their actions,ignorance is their biggest weapon-They are giving you a message of:My dear object if you dare to call me on my actions-lies-manipulations i will give you my silence because you don’t deserve my words,since you are a simple toy to me,i played you from day 1 and if you dare to rebel or see through that mask i will ignore you,because i know i’m lying,i’m manipulating,i just simply don’t care because you are my possession and my object,you always were,you let me walk away with all that,so you are going to allow me to walk away once again like back in the time’’4. Projection: Basically when you try to rise up your opinion they switch the blame to you playing the victim card telling you that you are overthinking stuff even though you are sure 100% they did that thing and you end up apologizing to them for the things you never did,because they know deep down inside how much they abuse you no matter what they do you will always stay,they are sure of it because they have tested you early on.Also very important:By learning to differ Love from Idealisation.Do Narcissists Love?Nope,they Idealize.Let me tell you the difference between Love and Idealization.Love:The ability to Empathize with the signNow other sharing feelings,care,appreciation,respect,value,also feeling genuinely for that person which includes emotions.Idealization:A form of Infatuation or Obsession with a specific thing or person,it does not include any Empathy.The Narcissist:A grown up with body and mindset lacks Empathy and operates from a 4 yo Emotional level,he is your typical wounded child trapped on that adult body and mindset,who never grew up emotionally and has no idea what Empathy means from the childhood constant trauma or abuse.The Development of Empathy:Empathy is the Core part of personality,it starts developing early from our childhood life,for instance for the child to reflect to people with empathy he needs to receive Empathy in return,meaning love,care,attention,appreciation,value from his or her parents.The Empathy needs to develop early on the childhood period otherwise if it does not develop it will stagnate and the child will end up Empty as shell.What makes a child a child?And what differs a grown up from a child?The main important thing what makes a child a child is their Emotional level,if you noticed early on the child lacks Emotionallity,for instance when they are developing,since it takes time to develop.For instance a child approaches you randomly and slaps you on the face,you are hurt while he laughs his ass off and your parents tell you that it’s just a child come on even though you are mad,that’s the lack of Empathy,at early stages of childhood the Empathy is under developed.The grown up has their emotional level totally developed,when they hit for example someone they will feel sorry for it and regret it later apologizing basically placing themselves to the shoes of the other person.How does the Narcissist Operate?They start by idealizing a specific thing,basically lets say the signNow other or a person,once they idealize they get the tunnel vision getting obsessed with that specific person,since it’s new and exciting.Even they trust themselves that they are in Love with that person,since they receive high octane fuel from that person.The difference is that they are not loving that person,they are basically loving the way that the person makes them feel about themselves.After a period of time cracks start to re appear since they possess low levels of boredom tolerance,just like your typical child who gets bored of everything,the void starts to emerge and their internal insecurities start to grow again and they start to question your worthiness,perhaps you were not that special after all because if you were the pain would have vanished till now,this goes through their mind over and over again with anyone new.Now they will start to groom new sources of supplies while they will start the Devaluation stage with you meaning they will extract their:Feelings,energy,time,attention,love from you.Now what happens?Once the enormous amounts of attention is extracted the victim starts to react not knowing what happened and they start to ask the Narcissist questions and call them on their actions,they see this gesture as a big threat to their safety and they start to activate their Defensive Mechanisms Manipulating the signNow other to protect their mask or facade.What does the defensive mechanism include,which reactions?1.For instance you call them on their toxic behavior-They will deny it completely.2.You seek for answers-They will provide you no answers.3.You seek on a closure-They will never give you a closure.4.You call them on their actions-They will switch the topic or switch the blame to you telling you that you are going crazy .Keep in mind the more the old source of supply or victim begs,pleads,clings the more Power the Narcissist feels,the more important they feel since they have a fragile ego and they operate solely from ego.Basically whatever the victim wants they will withhold it since the victim does not hold anymore value on their eyes since it has been replaced with the new exciting toy.They won’t discard since any reaction from you would have made them the center of attention and any reaction from you is always welcomed,they feed on your reactions be it a positive or a negative reaction because that makes the the center of attention.They view every each person as objects,they can’t Empathize with objects,every object is replaceable.What do the victims need to remember?That it was never about them it was all about the Narc and they should never blame themselves for anything,they should just accept it and move forward for their own good.The techniques used to Manipulate the victim as their automatic defensive mechanism:1.Gaslighting-Making you doubt your own sanity and vision.2.Projection-Projecting their insecurities to you once they are called on their actions.3.Silent Treatments-A form of passive aggression used to neutralize your attempts to call them on their toxic behavior taking 0 credit or responsibility for it.4.Stone Wall-When you start to search for answers switching the topic or changing the topic.5.Emotional Withholds-A form of punishment used by them if you keep them calling constantly on their toxic behavior,punishing you withholding love,affection,attention,care.Once the child is losing the game he will refuse to play the game,or once you confront the child with reality he just refuses to talk to you.Does this happen intentionally or unintentionally?This happens as their automatic response to a threat,this are their defensive mechanisms.A Narcissist never plans to idealize someone,it just happens.He never plans to devalue or discard anyone but it happens,because of the boredom and their constant hunger for supplies and everything new.Just like Adrenaline junkies seeking their high or druggies .A simple Story To Enlighten Your Thoughts-For instance lets say a kid wants a pet pretty bad a dog for instance a German Shepherd and his mom buys him the dog,he promises his mom that he will take care of the dog forever and that he is going to love the dog forever,keep in mind he is just 5 yo.The kid starts to Idealize the Dog since the dog is new and exciting,he is obsessed with the dog for a few weeks,months until he gets bored after he gets bored he starts to Devalue the dog since he does not feed Empathy to the dog not with that emotional level.He will leave the dog to starve to death since he is bored,now what happens?His mom takes over to feed the dog and take care of it.Now the question is does the kid know that he would idealize and devalue or discard the dog?Is it a plan?Absolutely not,idealization happens automatically and the discard happens also automatically when he gets bored,he would have never thought the dog that he was obsessed with he would have discarded it,neither he would have never thought that he would have Idealized the dog for a short period of time.Hope this helps:I tried to be as specific as possible,if it did help you leave a upvote and a comment with a positive feedback,took me quite a while to find the proper words to describe it,it would mean a lot.—————————————-AXL SALVATOR.————————————————-
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How do you know when someone really loves you?
When someone really loves you, you will find these points in your bond : * He/she cares even about your little things also. * He/she remembers all your things and your schedule and he/she takes interest and feel happy while doing it all. * He/she loves talking to you all the day even he/she will love your non sense talks and acts also. * He/she is loyal with you and always wants you to be around him/her. * He/she respects you and try to talk with you in a impressive manner. * He/she loves to think and talk with you about the beautiful moments you spent together. * He/she shares all his/her dark sides and all the bad moments and use to cry only infront of you. * He/she tries and do everything possible to just make you happy and bring a smile on your face. * He/she can’t listen anything bad about you from anyone. * He/she feels jealous when you hang out with other guys or talk about anyone else with him/her. * You think about his/her presence whenever you are sad or in a bad situation. * You feels like heaven when you are close to him/her and you need him/her every second. * He/she motivates,support and encourages you for your future rather than distracting. * He/she never demands anything from you. He/she only wants your attension and time. * He/she loves to talk about you with others and don’t afraid or embarrass to call you or talk with you infront of public. %3E “Love is all about loyalty, care and growing up together.” Suyash Goyan If you liked my thoughts then please upvote and do read my blog Life design [ https://lifedesigncom.blogspot.com ] . If these all points matches your relation then you are or will be a perfect couple . I wish that all get their true love. ❤ ONLINE STORE - Here is the new online Men’s Fashion Store named as Rockland - The Land of Lifestyle [ https://rocklandshopcom.blogspot.com ] . It contains the best rated products of the best brands from different online stores such as Amazon, Myntra, Jabong, Bewakoof etc. Now no one needs to visit different stores for the best products. Just visit the store Rockland - The Land of Lifestyle [ https://rocklandshopcom.blogspot.com ] . Go and shop for your wanted products like T-shirts & Polos, Shirts, Jeans , loafers , shoes and Watches and click the link directly to the located webpage. Shop now - Rockland - The Land of Lifestyle [ https://rocklandshopcom.blogspot.com ] Thank you !
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How can I create a new WeChat account in my mobile?
Download the mobile app on the Apple App Store or on Google Play.If you click Sign-Up, it will ask you to enter your phone number.Once you enter your mobile phone number, you will receive a verification code on your phone. Enter the code and submit.You cannot create new WeChat account without using a phone number.You’ve just registered for a new WeChat account!Enter your preferred name that will show up on your contacts on WeChat.You can also link your email address with your WeChat account so you can sign in with your email address in the future. You can read up how to do it here
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What are some tips for starting a blog?
Starting a blog in 2019 would be as similar as it was in 2009 because the basics to start a blog will always remain the same.People who want to start a blog but don't know from where to start.So this article is going to show the exact direction which I used to build this successful blog. The direction which you can replicate to build a blog much bigger than my blog.Read this ultimate guide on how to start blogging and see where you are today to take actions.Whether you are looking to start a new blog or looking forward to reinventing your blog, this article will give you step by step approach to start your blogging career.Do we really need a blog?This is a very common question when we start our online blogging career.As per my experience, I can say that blogging has become one of the integral parts to boost online business in any industry.It's like a channel to make relation all over the world and boost your online presence.When I started my blog in 2011, I didn't know anything about blogging and how to make money online. As a VLSI verification engineer, it was little tough for me to switch the field.But once I started reading more about blogs, things became more clear.Now, this blog is one of the top blogs in India and getting tons of awesome readers every month, awesome and enthusiastic readers like YOU.Chances are, you landed on this blog either by searching “how to start blogging” “how to start a blog” or your friend recommended this article to you.But the point is, you are reading this article now.This blog has gained such authority in the industry that I can teach people by sitting at home now.With this blog, my life has become more enjoyable, and I have ‘money + time' freedom now.So do you still have any excuse to not start a blog today?What are the benefits of a blog?We always look for the benefits.Either it's a college for our education, our first job or a new product we recently bought, we always try to understand about the benefits first.So here are the benefits of blogging.It's the strongest tool to boost your online presence.It helps you to understand more about your passion/interest.You make money by utilizing your skills.You build your online identity and trust.You become an authority in your industry.You make strong relations with your customers.You help the world by writing articles on your blog.You educate people about your products/services.People become your loyal readers which give you a strong recognition worldwide.You become more confident.You have money freedom.You have time freedom.And hundreds of more benefits when you become a blogger.Here is Complete Guide On How To Start BloggingHere we are going to read about each and every step which is necessary to build a blog.I have personally gone through each step to build this blog a brand, so I am not going to write anything without my personal experience.Check each and every point very carefully and help yourself to become a next good blogger.Let's read it.#1. Identify your interestI get many calls in a day.Everyone asking the same set of questions.They are confused about starting a blog and banging their head against walls to find a right mentor.According to them, blogging is just a method to make hell lots of money which they can do only with the help of right mentors.The very first question they ask is, “what should I write?”And I always reply first thing first.I.e., the very first thing you will have to find is your knowledge, passion, interest or enthusiasm about any topic.This topic could be a programming language which you are already using in your company, this could be specific job category (like marketing, HR manager, etc.) or this could be your passion for iPhone.At whatever stage you are in your life, we all have some special skill sets and passions which derive us.Ask yourself these questions:Can I write about my topic without getting bored?Do I have enough passion about my topic?Do I have enough knowledge about my topic?Where I want to see 5 years down the line?Will my blog's tone be powerful enough to captivate my audience?Is there any audience for my topic?Can I write for 6 months without worrying about income from my blog?Am I ready to learn too many new things?Once you have crisp and clear answers to these questions, you are good to go.Read the full article here - The Complete Guide On How To Start Blogging in 2019
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What are some signs you are an INTJ personality type?
$0.02People will constantly baffle you and seem irrational.Your quietness will often be confused for aloofness or superiority, and will invite hostility unless you actively socialize.You don't want to actively socialize, you rarely see the point.If you offer well-thought out insight into something, the majority of times, it will be seen as threatening to whomever and can be met with jealousy or hostility.You won't understand this reaction because to you, you were just sharing an idea and you could not care less who or where the idea came from.Politics seem absurd to you and you could point out a million inefficiencies and solutions that will never see the light of day (because, politics.)You are better at relationships with the opposite (or same) sex than most people give you credit for. You just don't care to display 'prowess' for the sake of it.You probably defer to science and logic to explain the universe as opposed to the supernatural or anything that speaks to tradition for the sake of it.You can have a self-deprecating and/or sarcastic sense of humor. You realize you are but one of a few billion.You love knowing you are rare. More because it explains a lot as opposed to the 'precious snowflake' appeal to vanity, though you'll indulge that too.Some people might see you as a nerd or a geek but your self-identity is typically much broader; whatever deep interest invites the 'nerd' or 'geek' label is usually just one facet of many of who you are. You can have exceptional aesthetic taste, be hugely creative, be an athlete etc. Independence and mastery are better identifiers.Contrary to appearance, you are an emotional person. They are just deeper and not so 'surface'. They are authentic and come with a lot of vulnerability, in your view. This will usually explain why you do not like to be seen showing emotion. To you, emotional displays are the ultimate form of honesty requiring a lot of trust, and therefore difficult and uncomfortable.Unless things are really askew, your word is your bond.Privacy is paramount. You carry with you an entire universe in your head that the real world rarely competes with in terms of complexity or richness. This is why small-talk is so infuriating (and exhausting). Compared to what goes on in your mind there is no contest.You could be better at being in the moment.You could use small-talk as a way to 'take a person in', and realize most people use it for that purpose.Escaping into a book can sometimes save you from getting lost in analysis-paralysis or ruminating.You believe INTJ leadership could probably fix the world in a generation but you are resigned to the fact that this will never happen.
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How can I improve my public speaking skills?
I had to speak at TEDxSanDiego and five minutes before I went up I left the building and wasn’t planning on coming back.Speaking before me was the amazing Gabrielle Ury. Differently-abled from birth, I was crying by the end of her talk of resilience.I was the last speaker. And then after me was the San Diego ballet.HELP! I was sandwiched between the two most amazing events in the world.I was going to go on stage and die.I walked around the block. I walked again. I went back into the hall.“Where were you!?”They wired me up. Everyone in the crowd was crying because of Gabrielle.“Congrats,” I said to Gabrielle and she ran into her dad’s arms and cried.Then I had to speak in front of 5,000 people. I threw up in my mouth a little I was so scared. Then I walked onto the stage:One time my company had just been bought by a much bigger one. I had to speak at their annual event.If I bombed the talk, then they would regret buying me (and the final check hadn’t come through yet).Well, I said, it wouldn’t be the first time I’ve ruined my life. But I was terrified.I had just gotten a divorce.I was on a date.We had spoken before the date. We had met on a website and she wanted to make sure I wasn’t a weirdo. We spoke and it was like we knew each other forever.We went on the date. Before the date I did the below technique for four hours.I was scared to death. I hadn’t been on a “date” with a stranger in about ten years.It was the same terror I felt before public speaking.I did the below technique I describe for public speaking. In the middle of the date she went to the bathroom and I texted my friend, ‘I’m going to kiss her’”.And I did, and it worked, and we began dating, and we saw each other again and again and again and each time I used the techniques below.She was a therapist. I lived in the Chelsea Hotel. She said to me, “If you live in a hotel, it means you’re not ready to have roots.”I said, “But I lived in this hotel for four years BEFORE I got married. This IS my roots.” Doesn’t matter.I moved into a real apartment. And then we broke up. A week later she wrote to me, “As a therapist, I can tell you that you need serious help.”Nevertheless, the public speaking tips worked. But I was insecure and scared and I did need help.Serious help.Before going to every party, before going on a date. Before going to a meeting. Before giving a talk. Before doing standup.I watch comedians. I’ve been doing this for 12 years. EVERY SINGLE DATE. EVERY PARTY. EVERY TALK. EVERY MEETING.I am going on a podcast today. “Impact Theory”. I highly recommend this podcast done by my friend, Tom Bilyeu.I’m nervous. But I will still do this technique. I will watch standup comedians on youtube along the way.Why comedians?A) The best comedians are the best public speakers. They know how to make a solid premise that everyone can relate to in as few words as possible.They then know how to “pull the rabbit out of a hat”. Surprise! A punch line that reverses the premise or underlines it in some unique way. The best comedians use laughter as the vehicle to deliver a unique thought. A new way of looking at life.B) They know how to Act.A good comic will “act out” a joke. Play voices. Give a visual image of the idea they are trying to convey.Even the best public speakers rarely do this. But comedians ALWAYS do it.Since starting standup comedy (I perform 3–4x a week for the past 4–5 years) my public speaking skills have gone up 10x.C) They are fearless.Comedians commit to the joke, commit to the act, commit to the outrageousness not matter how scary it seems.Commitment to the moment, no matter how scary, is part of the micro-skill tool kit of the best comedians. Think of Gilbert Gottfried in his filthy joke “The Aristocrats” or Andy Samberg in his Harvard Commencement Speech.(watch this for commitment).Or TJ Miller at the Critics Choice Awards when he runs into the audience and nobody knows what he is doing but he runs from person to person making jokes with people.D) They are modern day philosophers.The worst comedians go on stage with their jokes. The jokes are funny. They get people to laugh.They have premise, then punchline, then some acting-out, then maybe a continuation punch line.Ok.But they say nothing meaningful.This is what separates the D- comedians from the A+ comedians.From Richard Pryor to George Carlin to Dave Chappelle to many many others I can list, comedians have become our modern day philosophers;. Is it crazy to say Dave Chappele is a Socrates? Yes it is. But it’s true.E) They are funny.The average child laughs 300 times a day. The average adult…5 times a day. FIVE TIMES.We lose the ability to laugh as an adult. Or we have too many responsibilities and stresses.And yet laughter is shown to be a natural medicine. It reduces stress. it’s anti-inflammatory. It’s blah blah blah. It’s great.Also, people remember what is said immediately after they laugh.And, finally, laughter increases oxytocin, the “pairing” neurochemical. So this great on a date.(neurochemicals released upon laughter)F) A great comedian has his or her own unique voice.The great comedians have a unique take on society, people, relationships, creativity, politics, observation of the absurd, and a perspective on how to live life.Not that they live exemplary lives. But they have a unique voice and all creative should develop one. Artists, writers, speakers, businessmen, parents, people.If you are just starting standup comedy, don’t think about jokes. Think about what ideas and perspectives you have that are unique.Make a joke around those.Example: I saw Chappelle at Radio Music Hall. One time he said, “We call Caitlyn Jenner when she changed her name, but we threw Mohammed Ali in jail.”That was his joke. It’s not even funny. And there’s no punchline. And maybe it’s not quite accurate. But it’s an interesting point about race and gender and identity politics and worth thinking about.Everyone laughed. Not because it was funny. But because Dave Chappele said it and then he laughed and he backed up a little and leaned down and hit his knee with the mic and laughed more.He taught us to laugh at that joke so the entire audience did because we were under his control.This is a great public speaker.G) Mirror NeuronsIf I want to learn how to climb a ladder, I won’t climb one. I’m afraid of heights.I’ll watch you climb one.My mirror neurons kick in, at least for awhile, and now I know how to climb a ladder.When I watch great comedians, for a short time, I can “inherit” their skills and perform, speak, talk at a party, overcome being an introvert, be courageous on a date, or in a negotiation.This has saved my life 100s of times.(watching Gilbert gives me confidence and permission to be as silly and outrageous as possible).H) Ability to ObserveA “civilian” walks into a pizza place and eats a pizza.A comedian might walk into the same pizza place, notice it’s run by four African-American women and wonder if he’s racist for noticing that. (Louis CK’s SNL Monologue).They observe everything. They try to find the strange and unusual in everything.Seinfeld made observational humor famous. But all comedians have developed a sixth sense for observing the absurd.I was doing a podcast with TJ Miller. I asked, “how do you find the absurd.”He said, “We can sit here and talk about the weeds of comedy or I can point out how this table we are talking is like a big table for a doll’s house, the wallpaper in this club is like out of ‘The Shining’, why are these mics so big when we are right next to each other, and you should put chicken bones in your hair and let them fall out in front of people.”Look around you every moment. Find the absurd.The “Absurdity Muscle” is important to exercise every day.I) LikabilityYou won’t laugh or pay attention to someone (particularly a comedian) if you don’t like them.The best comedians have the skill of making an audience of diverse strangers like them in a matter of seconds.If all I can do is learn this skill from watching how comedians do it, then this is a great skill to have.J) MAGICComedians pull the rabbit out of the hat.They say something to create tension. The entire audience looks up. Tense.Then the comedians release the tension in unexpected ways.This is how we, as a species, practice unsafe or tense situations.This is great public speaking.Learning how to get people to LOOK UP when everyone is looking down at their phones is the most valuable skill.I’m an introvert. I’m shy. I re-energize by myself.I started doing standup myself to get even better at so many other ancillary skills (public speaking, idea generation, observing, negotiating, selling, likability, frame control, etc).Always go to the place least crowded.The place most crowded is the comfort zone. Because it’s comfortable!It’s so hard. I hate it. But I watch these comedians. And I do it.[NOTE: Everyone should have their own list. I am a man so that skews my list.]A) LOUIS CK:One of the deepest thinkers out there.He knows exactly what words to express, to pause on, to look around on, to bring the audience in.He knows how to create a premise in as few words as possible.He knows how to act out the roles of every participant in a story.He knows the arc of a story and tells it in each joke.He can see the absurd with x-ray vision.He can say something hateful and two seconds later bring the audience on the ride with him.B) DAVE CHAPPELLEThe master story teller.He speaks in joke.But he’s not just saying dumb one liners I see from so many comics.He tells a story about his life that is meaningful and deep and changes the perspective of the listeners.PLUS, he’s INSANELY likable. Watch his comedy as a teenager. Watch his recent Netflix specials 30 years later. It’s insane how he’s held on to that likability despite his successes.C) JEROD CARMICHAELThe master of communicating a message while at the same time acting as if he’s trying to figure it out right there, on the stage, with the audience.His delivery, his pace, has created his own unique style. I watched his special “8” at least 40 times. Directed by Bo Burnham.D) BO BURNHAMMaster of the surprise. He is a performer’s performer. Watching him and I learn how to create surprise out of every opportunity.Plus, it’s such a pleasure to see raw genius in action.(the Bo Burnham Kanye West rant is genius in action)E) GILBERT GOTTFRIEDYes, Gilbert Gottfried.He’s only been doing standup comedy for FIFTY YEARS.He is so silly. He commits so hard to his persona. Even absorbing one percent of his skill frees me from all conventions when dealing with others: from a negotiation to the most serious talk.I never took him seriously before.Now he is the only MUST-WATCH comedian before every thing I do that requires courage with a dash of the silly and absurd.F) ANDY SAMBERGNot a traditional standup comedian.But I have watched his Harvard Commencement speech a million times.I’ve watched it before every talk I have ever given in the past 3 years.Every time you think he’s about to get serous, he takes another swerve into the ludicrous.And he never stops. It’s like watching the movie Inception. You never get back to reality. And then you realize suddenly that’s where the message is. That’s where the art is. That’s where the courage is.And he's funny.G) DREW MICHAELMaybe the smartest comedian out there.I watch him for the depth of his thoughts. And the insane way he delivers his perspective.I also like that Jerrod Carmichael directed his recent HBO special. I like how all of these standup comedians are growing up together, helping each other out. That, by itself, is a lesson.Drew comes off as angry, but then you realize the compassion underneath that, when mixed together, creates his likability and humor and perspective.H) ANTHONY JESELNIKImagine being arrogant, abrasive, and insulting, every second of a comedy hour.And the entire time the audience LOVES you and every minute of it.Jeselnik is THE master of timing and delivery. Nobody does it better. And his ability to play an unlikable persona that is extremely likable is key.I) BONNIE MCFARLANEShe goes back and forth between multiple persona in a single joke.She told me: always try to start with a premise that is funny. That makes it easier to make a punch line.So: instead of saying, “Busses are crazy” [premise]. The premise might be “My therapist is a refugee from ISIS”. (Dealing with housewives complaining about how to decorate their houses, etc).J) TONY ROCKHe gave me two pieces of writing advice:write down all the important events in your life.write five sub-points between each itemfind the punchlines.He also said,“If you have writer’s block, take on the perspective of someone else and write a routine for that person”.So when he had writer’s block he wrote an entire 60 minute special for an Eddie Murphy comeback (when he described it, it was hilarious). I don’t know if he’s ever approached Murphy with it.K) TJ MILLERWatch his special “Meticulously Ridiculous”. His joke, “8 reasons I don’t give a ***”.He told me, “I am the hardest working comedian out there. It’s amazing to me how many people feel entitled to results but don’t put the work in.”He showed me his calendar. He was performing at SEVEN different comedy clubs that very night.This is a small list. It’s not a list in any order. It’s not a top 10. I could keep going:Marina Franklin, Michelle Wulf, Chris Rock (study his movement on stage), Jim Norton (ultimate vulnerability), Sebastian Maniscalco (mastery of persona), Geno Bisonte (laughs per minute), Aaron Berg (laughs per minute.), Ashley Morris, Greer Barnes, Allan Havey, Todd Barry (crowd work), Judah Friedlander (crowd work), Sherrod Small (calling out what the audience is thinking), Sarah Silverman (likability, combines innocence with sharpness), Gary Gulman (the master of joke writing), Jim Gaffigan (vulnerability, taking every day like and piercing through to the funny), Rich Vos (delivery, observation, fearlessness), Godfrey (sheer intelligence, turning “extreme alpha maleness” into funny), Steven Wright (dryness and one liners), Mike Biribiglia (master of story telling while still punctuated with punchlines), Neal Brennan (the brilliance of his special “Three Mics”), Seinfeld (master of observation), Larry David (observer of the absurd), and this list is only limited by my faulty memory.——The other day I had to perform for 20 minutes.I watched Louis CK, Dave Chappelle, Jerrod Carmichael, Drew Michael, Todd Barry, Aaron Berg (who was performing right after me), Geno Bisconte, Judah Friedlander, Steven Wright, Mitch Hedberg.I went to the club.Some of the comedians were too lazy to even memorize their jokes. They had their notes on stage with them and they would say things like, “Well that joke didn’t work!”To me, that’s not comedy. I can watch that on YouTube. Comedy at a comedy club is humor + experience. Not just humor.And I don’t want to know that I am just there for them to practice ‘jokes’.I wanted to see the comics with real perspective. I wanted to be challenged.I was scared, though. And when I went on stage, I ended up doing NONE of the material I had prepared.The audience was 90% from other countries. (It was Thanksgiving Day in the US).I pretended that we (the audience and me) were the UN and that we would solve each country’s problems. Everyone in the audience told me what country they were from and I “solved” their problems in ludicrous ways.I stood on the bannister surrounding the stage so it would appear like I was looming over the audience.It was fun for me. “The party is where I am at!” is what I always tell myself. You’re just invited.Tomorrow I have to give a talk at a conference. Wish me luck!
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